Sobiprincess...I want to run to you and give you a big hug right now!
I am called Umme (Mother) by alot of "lost and hurt souls" and now I want to "hug" you, welcoming you into the fold. I have a few souls in Cali now that I connect with and I want to offer you that love.
First of all, I bow to your strength; it takes alot to write abut your difficulties and your strife. That, in and of itself, is VERY thereputic! The more you tell your story, the more it gets out in the world and that will bring more universal love your way...like this! 
I would like to formally talk to you and offer the Tribal and Ancestural love that is so needed in your life because you need to purge that pain.
You need to soulfully cry!
Then you need to be the person you were sent here to be; but you cant do that in pain. I now offer you the soulful "asprin" now. If you decide (after prayer and meditation) to take the "pill" know that the pain will eventually leave you and you will be healed; the trick is to not put yourself in the situations that will cause you to be in that pain again. If you decide NOT to take the pill you will still heal; your lesson will be just learned over a longer period of time and the (scar) might be a bit darker.
If you followed me in this; please give me a call 404-441-1894.
The Tribe awaits!
Umme Ameena